Try Things You Think You Cannot Do
I know there are things each of us have wanted to try, but don’t because of the belief that we can’t do them. Each of us has those secret dreams that are buried so deep as to be a secret buried with you when you are no longer of this earth. I know I have many such desires. One of my favorite quotes from Kurt Vonnegut is, “Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are, "It might have been”. As someone who never wants to face such wistfulness I have always tried to live a life where those four words “It might have been” does not haunt me. Yet, like all humans, it is inevitable that a list of regrets will be a part of my own narrative.
Perhaps because of this, I have tried to find things I have wanted to do and as my father liked to say, “try”, regardless of however foolish I think it might be. One of the things I have always wanted to do is to sing in a choral group. Coming from my family and apparently because of my Korean heritage, being able to carry a tune is nearly a requirement for admittance into the Kim clan. Let’s just say that Karaoke machines are a norm in our houses, particularly the ones that rate your performance, so that each Karaoke session turns into a competition. Some could wonder how a “fun” activity could turn into a competition with a possible ensuing trauma requiring endless hours of therapy sessions. The only thing I can say is that for my eccentric family, this was all too possible.
Therefore it is assumed I can carry a tune since if I hadn’t been able to, well, imagine the trauma. And after years of Suzuki violin and piano, I have an ear even if my sight reading abilities are not very good. For those who have studied Suzuki, you can probably relate to my experience. This idea of singing in a choral group has been one I’ve always thought about, but pushed aside because, well, you know the litany of reasons for why not outnumbers those for.
Recently I decided that there is no time to waste since if I want to sing with a choral group, I’d better get on it since who knows how long it would take me. So, I have taken a few singing lessons, which, as you can imagine, is way out of my comfort zone. After my initial embarrassment, I have come to enjoy my time in that room singing. Since I have a very specific goal, I am understanding my range and vocal techniques, especially harmonizing. There is no danger I’m giving up my career to become a singer, but I’m hoping I am feel confidant one day to audition to be able to sing with a choral group. And, if I get rejected, I won’t be devastated since I can strike off this one “it might have been” off of my list.